Category: Alcoholism

A term that seems to be very common at the moment is Gaslighting - which basically means that one person is trying to make the other believe that things are different from what they seem. In this video Lou and John discuss the relevance of the term in relation to problem drinking. Read More >

This is an issue that we found in the Forum and felt that we really needed to address it as it could be a hindrance to getting help and support. While we can easily understand, and even sympathise, with this point of view, we disagree with it. Of course we want to be loyal to …

Continue reading "Is talking to someone about the drinking being disloyal to my drinker"

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We are approaching a time of celebrations, eg the Queen’s Jubilee in the UK, 4th July in US. Some of you may be looking forward to it others may be dreading it. Lou and John offer a few tips on how to survive this time.

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One of the old chestnuts of addiction recovery is this question - Do drinkers need to deal with their past before they can stop drinking?  In this video Lou and John discuss the issue and their different approaches to helping clients. Also Lou talks about deprivation and abuse and differentiates between them and how she …

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You are living in the same house, you are seeing the same issues and consequences, and YET!!  When you talk about the drinking, the problems, the solutions it feels like you. not only don't live in the same house, in fact you live on different planets.  How can this possibly happen?? In this video about …

Continue reading "Living with a drinker – Why can’t we agree?"

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In this video Lou discusses how we adjust to change. At first it can be very strange and incomprehensible but slowly we start to accept and recognise what is happening. Lou compares it to learning a new language, that at first we struggle, ten we translate from our native language and eventually we think in …

Continue reading "Help Change Feels Impossible"

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Sometimes, when we are in the midst of change, it can feel like little is happening or, worse, that we are going backwards. Lou describes the journey of change as more like a journey through a city than one through the countryside. In the latter we can usually see quite far ahead and have a …

Continue reading "What the Journey of Change Looks Like"

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In this video Lou talks about her marriage to a drinker. Would she have changed how she had approached him, how she had discussed things with the children - almost certainly! Hear what she would have changed and why in this candid video. To watch the other videos in this series follow the links below. …

Continue reading "Things I wish I had known about problem drinking during my marriage"

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Continuing with the series of - Things I know now that wish I had known ...., Lou talks about the beginning of her relationship.  What would she have done differently, would she still have got married or what would she have changed.  Find out by watching this video. To watch the other videos in this …

Continue reading "Things I wish I had known at the beginning of my relationship"

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This is the first in another short series of videos.  In this series we are answering the question - If I had known then what I do now then ,,,,,? In this first video John is answering the question about the beginning of his drinking.  It is about Problem drinking signs I wish I had …

Continue reading "Problem Drinking Signs I Wish I had not Ignored"

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