Is talking to someone about the drinking being disloyal to my drinker

This is an issue that we found in the Forum and felt that we really needed to address it as it could be a hindrance to getting help and support.

While we can easily understand, and even sympathise, with this point of view, we disagree with it. Of course we want to be loyal to our loved ones and, wherever possible, protect them. But there are two aspects to this issue.

First, as we have mentioned often in other videos, addiction thrives in secrecy. That is, it is much easier to engage in addictive behaviour if no one is aware of it. The more that people are aware of the situation, the more addicts hide what they do.

Second, there is a prevalent view that the problem, its consequences and resolution, is the sole ownership of the drinker. The very fact that you are looking at this website shows you that this is not the case. You need to get help and support for your pain. Looking after yourself is not betraying your loved one!!

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