Is talking to someone about the drinking being disloyal to my drinker

This is an issue that we found in the Forum and felt that we really needed to address it as it could be a hindrance to getting help and support. While we can easily understand, and even sympathise, with this point of view, we disagree with it. Of course we want to be loyal to … Read More >

Living with an alcoholic and coping with the summer celebrations

We are approaching a time of celebrations, eg the Queen’s Jubilee in the UK, 4th July in US. Some of you may be looking forward to it others may be dreading it. Lou and John offer a few tips on how to survive this time.

Read More >

Do drinkers need to deal with their past before they can stop drinking?

One of the old chestnuts of addiction recovery is this question - Do drinkers need to deal with their past before they can stop drinking?  In this video Lou and John discuss the issue and their different approaches to helping clients. Also Lou talks about deprivation and abuse and differentiates between them and how she … Read More >

Living with a drinker – Why can’t we agree?

You are living in the same house, you are seeing the same issues and consequences, and YET!!  When you talk about the drinking, the problems, the solutions it feels like you. not only don't live in the same house, in fact you live on different planets.  How can this possibly happen?? In this video about … Read More >

Help Change Feels Impossible

In this video Lou discusses how we adjust to change. At first it can be very strange and incomprehensible but slowly we start to accept and recognise what is happening. Lou compares it to learning a new language, that at first we struggle, ten we translate from our native language and eventually we think in … Read More >

What the Journey of Change Looks Like

Sometimes, when we are in the midst of change, it can feel like little is happening or, worse, that we are going backwards. Lou describes the journey of change as more like a journey through a city than one through the countryside. In the latter we can usually see quite far ahead and have a … Read More >

Things I wish I had known about problem drinking during my marriage

In this video Lou talks about her marriage to a drinker. Would she have changed how she had approached him, how she had discussed things with the children - almost certainly! Hear what she would have changed and why in this candid video. To watch the other videos in this series follow the links below. … Read More >

Things I wish I had known at the beginning of my relationship

Continuing with the series of - Things I know now that wish I had known ...., Lou talks about the beginning of her relationship.  What would she have done differently, would she still have got married or what would she have changed.  Find out by watching this video. To watch the other videos in this … Read More >

Am I just making a fuss

Very often partners of alcoholics will feel that they are ‘just making a fuss’ if they criticise their drinker’s behaviour. There are a couple of reasons for this feeling, an obvious one being the drinker will tell them that.

Read More >

I’m Listening

This is the second video in this short series about 1 to 1 with John.  In the series Lou interviews John about his sessions and asks him about the most common issues that arise. In this video John discusses the most common issue of all, that people just need to talk, to share what is … Read More >

In partnership with

Internet Creation

Please help us to keep it available for all by making a donation.